The Magic Christian (1969) Joseph McGrath directs a comedy cornucopia of wacky characters, starting with Peter Sellers as Guy Grand, the richest man in the world, who adapts a bum off a park bench, Ringo Starr, to assist him in his enterprise of proving that “everyone has their price.” Freely adapted from the novel by Terry Southern, those who can be bought include John Cleese, Graham Chapman, Raquel Welch, Spike Milligan, Christopher Lee, Richard Attenborough, and Roman Polanski.
It’s dog eat dog at the dog shows;
You gotta kill the competition.
Nothing gives the rich greater pleasure
That watching people beg for jobs.
The amount of X establishes the value of Y
Where X equals money and Y equals natural resources.
To make money you must have money,
So give Goldman Sacs the key to the banks.
Which piece of Rembrandt would you giphy?
Or trick for in a Hamlet striptease?
On a pheasant hunt, thanks to the NRA,
One anti-aircraft gun can take most nature down.
Double agents double blackmail profits,
Offering special deals for President’s Day.
Into a steaming vat of Franklins,
Sewers spew mercenary politicians.
But the value of X keeps changing
So you get less for less, and vice versa.
If it’s gold you want, there’s plenty of that
On each toilet seat aboard The Magic Christian.
Abandon all faith, ye who enter here.
Aboard that iceberg of nationalism,
Frozen peacock brains taste so chic.
[Disposable Poem February 16, 2017]